Zim's Keep Out
by cupidity11
Summary: HIATUS: The Invader's side to Dib's Keep Out. ZaDr
1. Chapter 1

_Location: EARTH,CLASSROOM_

_Environment: UNHOSTILE_

_Time: 6893 Ligas (8:09 am)_

Stepping into the classroom, the first thing I notice is the unignoreable scent of meat. It's overwhelming and I barely stop myself from gagging. My amazing body must appear alert unless these fools notice something. Not that they would. They are stupid and primitive as time reveals. Even as I speak with the barest intelligence so they can understand, I can feel eyes on me. My own dart from earth worm to earth worm…

_Scanning…no threat. The face is discarded as useless. Next child._

_Scanning…no threat. Next._

_Scanning…no threat. Next._

"Okay, am I the only who sees the alien sitting in class." An annoying voice interrupts the quiet disgustingness of the moment. Without permission my neck twists and I am staring back into large eyes, encased with glass protection. There's something in those eyes that has me almost…worried. It's something new. Something I haven't seen on any of the faces of these dirt-stains; intelligence, determination.

_Scanning…threat. Human, Dib. Age: 11. Saved to the database. _

The more the idiotic human speaks, the more he attempts to make his moronic peers listen to him the more my panic fades. However there's something more that sparks in my superior blood; rage. The first lick of it I've felt since…no, I can't remember ever being this angry. This prepared to jump across the room and kill the pale creature with my bare hands…well not bare. That would be unsanitary.

_Monitoring…_

The longer we talk, the more we battle with our wits inside this disgusting classroom the more I begin to see the human before me. He is certainly not like the others. Perhaps the devices on his eyes give him a different form of sight. The more I notice the way he stands and the light way he stares back at me as if seeing through the brilliant disguise, the more uneasy I feel. But, I also feel exhilarated. And that is something that I have not felt since OID 1.

_Dib; Worthy Adversary. _

_Location: EARTH; LAB_

_Environment: UNKNOWN_

_Time: 0923 Ligas (12:13 am)_

My left eye aches. A sharp jab with meaty human hands did that. Harsh bruises will soon be forming on my poor arms where Dib grabbed me in his desperate mode. And perhaps the blood spouting my the gash on my forehead will cease from the painful smack into that stupid brick wall.

But, there's no pain. It's instead a hollow sort of agony. The only reason I notice is because he made them. There's no cause for alarm. These minor injuries will heal soon with my superior abilities, my fantastic linage. Yet, I can look down at the nail indentures in my forearm and know who it's from. The soft jagged edges are his. Because he chews them to nubs. An odd human reaction to stress and anxiety. A nervous habit apparently.

This interested me. I looked up habits, nervousness, anxiety, nails…and it was all so dull. But, the fact that it related to my greatest adversary had me taking the time, making myself be patient. It was needed to defeat the human. I must know everything there is to know. In order to take over Earth, he must fall to his knees before Zim.

_Healing initiated. _

As predicted the skin begins to smooth over, the blood stops and it's as if it never happened. I glance back at the screen before me where it shows Dib. The eyes that remind me sort of like fire, wide and neurotic. Face scrunched up in the throbbing as he nursed his own wounds which would not heal as expertly as mine do.

No, according to my new found knowledge, they are deep enough to become scars. Marks on the flesh of tissue that never goes away. This fascinates me. I can pretend the war between us isn't happening, imagine like the human never got the upper hand. But, the Dib-Monkey will always look down and see what I've done to him. He will forever carry our battles on his skin.

A smile rises to my face unbidden.

_Dib; Enemy._


	2. Chapter 2

_Location: EARTH; SKOOL  
>Environment: UNKNOWN<br>Time: 7820 Ligas (9:09 am )_

I duck through the crowds of pig smellies, unseeing their faces. They all look the same and my Pak registers them as such. They mean nothing to me, are worth nothing and will one day soon be just horrible memories as they burn under my almighty fist.

My antenna twitch under the hated, itchy wig. Apparently I am a 'freak' in the eyes of the humans at this establishment. With no knowledge on the subject I assume it's a good thing and keep walking, eager to rid myself of their stench.

But, out of the corner of my eye I see a streak of black hair rising up out of the sea of miscreants. It's shaped as a scythe, mimicking an irken's antenna. Instinct has me in its grasp, body tensing in preparation because I know there's only one human in the entire world who has hair like that, who moves that quickly through the terrifying crowd. Only one person who would ever want or have a reason to.

_Locating…Dib.  
>Environment: HOSTILE <em>

In a flash I am ready; in seconds I feel the rush that must feed him as well. Our fight begins this way every day. In the hallways of the skool. People duck out of the way, knowing there's violence to come although now they are so used to it they never stop to watch unless particularly bored. We are the sideshow everyone has memorized. Only we never tire of it.

_Warning!: Pak logic does not comprehend…_

I stop in the middle of the hallway, to glance backwards at my back. Huh. That's rather annoying. Never remember it ever doing that before. Perhaps it was this earth air.

Shrugging I mentally disable the little alarm and turn back to grin at the human child who is smirking at me with that devious glimmer of determination and a promise of a thousand deaths. I can't help but shiver as if I'm cold.

Stupid earth air.

_Location: BASE  
>Environment: UNKNOWN<br>Time: 3447 Ligas (4:15 pm )_

I come inside my base, ignore the random squealing of my minion, and stumble into the elevator that brings me to my lab. There's pain this time. He'd gotten a good shot in. I can admire the skill it took to make such a well placed mark on my perfect body. I had let my guard down for a millisecond it seemed and now I was paying the price. But, oh the Dib-Stink would pay for every drop of blood I was losing with his own.

But, now I had to heal. Now I had to do real work. Research. The doors open and the large expanses of my beautiful lab are revealed.

_Healing Initiated. _

Once the nuisance is over and done with I flop down into my favorite chair, and crack my knuckles. I begin with looking up stuff found in the Dib-thing's book about aliens.

Within ten minutes I am sure that everyone on this planet is insane. All of it is complete dookie and I close the webpage rather nauseas. Honestly, how much could one learn from a stupid human's butt? In all my life I had never once heard of anyone using such a thing as an 'anal' probe.

I add this to my growing list of stuff I know about humans. Apparently they believe aliens just go around and poke at their behinds. Sniffing distantly, I am prepared to work on some of my inventions when something catches my eye on the side of the screen.

It's this delicious looking confection. Odd because after a few months of living here I had assumed humans just ate poison. But, this actually looks yummy,sugary…I click on the bar and it brings up information on where I can find this treat apparently called, 'ice cream'.


	3. Chapter 3

_Location: UPPER BASE  
>Environment: UNKNOWN<br>Time: 3548 Ligas (5:45 pm)_

Through the promise of suck monkies and tons of new rubber piggies I, the almighty Zim have once again convinced my annoying minion into doing my bidding.

Now, I sit cross-legged on my spotless floor, staring hesitantly at the large glop of green stuff on a cone like structure. Apparently it's a waffle cone and mint flavored ice cream.

I lick my lips kind of nervously. What if it kills me? But, even if this stuff is my death, I can't help the way my antenna twitch impatiently. They can smell the sweetness drifting from it and it makes my mouth water. Glancing around suspiciously, I finally flick my tongue out to lick up the side of the ice cream.

I freeze at how cold it is, how sticky and…wonderful. Its melt-y and messy but sweeter than anything he'd ever tasted before. It was like semi solid magic. I could've taken time to savor my treat but self restraint was for boring Irkens. Within seconds the ice cream was gone and I was left to mourn it.

Smacking my lips, I stood from the awkward position on the floor, quite satisfied with my research. Perhaps the humans could do a few things right. Maybe.

But, they were still morons.

_Location: BACKYARD  
>Environment: UNKNOWN<br>Time: 8909 Ligas (9:20 PM)_

Something is wrong with my Pak. I realize now that the environment is always either unknown. It never deviates unless the human is around. Then it is hostile. Perhaps, this means my Pak is always unsure of my safety.

Never mind. That is a thought for another time. It turns out I am the owner of something called a backyard. It's quite tiny and filled with tons of rubber piggies. Gir had obviously found it before me. Stupid robot.

I am reluctant to venture further into the yard however. Not because Zim is scared, of course not. But, because of the green stuff. So far I have managed to avoid touching it. Everything else on this pitiful planet has thus far harmed my beautiful body. But, something must be done about it.

Peeking about, I finally kneel and with a gloved hand, pluck a single blade of the stuff to carry with me. Its very light, and a cautious sniff reveals it smells very…eh…green. The computer tells me that it is harmless so with much bravery, I put one foot on the stuff called 'grass. It's bouncy-ish, gives under my weight.

Experimenting, I walk the edges of the yard. After an hour of doing so, I notice that it does not appear to be making me explode. Grass is friendly. Running my bare hands over the stuff is getting boring, but I do like the tickling sensation.

A brilliant idea enters my genius brain; glancing around, in case the Dib-thing is near, I remove one boot and then the other. Hmm….it's slightly cold but still safe. The blades curl around my toes. The grass respects me, the almighty Zim. Good. So, that's two things that Earth seems to have gotten right.


	4. Chapter 4

_Location: The ground is dirty. The sky is red with pollution. And I can hear the Dib running after me.  
>Environment: Hostile Level 2.<br>Time: 23:98 Ligas (10:30 pm)_

Stupid earth worm. Children on this planet are supposed to be in bed by now. Or at least that's what my research tells me. Dib however is blatantly ignoring that fact. In fact, the entire time we've been rivals (around six earth months now) I do not think I've noticed him sleep for more than three hours at a time. Most of them in skool.

Tonight began because of an experiment; a bunch of rabid, cyber, weasels. I planned to unleash them on the town and see what happened. But of course the hyooman had to stop me. It was an act of pure luck however.

"Give it up, Zim!" Dib-Thing screamed from behind me, easily loping over the trash cans I tipped in hopes of slowing his perusal. I was an Invader. This kind of stuff was what I was trained for. But, apparently Dib-Monkey had been training for my arrival his whole life.

We were even. At least in this.

_Location: BASE, UNDERGROUND LEVEL 3  
>Environment: HOSTILE LEVEL 7<br>Time: 9998 Ligas (7:23 pm)_

The event that I had sworn would never happen has; Dib has bested me. Through our now 8 month long war, I've had the chance to kill him. In fact, I've had four chances. The only thing stopping me was the fact that Dib-Stupid was amusing enough to keep alive as he fought to stop me from taking over.

I'd laughed as he struggled to free himself and then released him, unconscious in his bedroom, confident that I'd won once again and would continue to win.

But, tonight…I was helpless. My arms and legs were tied down. My Pak was fitted with a custom made shield. The stink-boy knew I could slice open the bounds with my spider legs. Smart. I gave him a point. For once in my life I had no control. I had no hope to escape.

Dib had laughed at me this time, the whites of his teeth in the dark laboratory was eerie. I could see the lights shining off the eye shields, making him seem rather demented. But, it was when I felt that scalpel press against my neck that I knew I'd been bested.

Inside of my Pak, it acknowledged the fact. The fact that I, Zim had been beaten by a human. My greatest enemy.

A few seconds of heavy anticipation for pain before I felt a needle inside of my arm. Everything went dark and when I woke up, freed a few minutes later Dib was long gone. But, he'd left a tiny nick on my neck. It would heal of course. In a way I almost didn't want it to.

Warning: PAK LOGIC DOES NOT COMPREHEND…

I jerk and disable the annoying alarm. Again. A nagging feeling in my Squeedely Spooch yelled at me to check out what the machine meant.

Another part was happy to let it go. I listened to that part.

_Dib: Equal._


	5. Chapter 5

_Location: PARK, EARTH  
>Environment: UNKNOWN<br>Time: 3001 Ligas (8:30 pm)_

The sun is setting on the disgusting little town in the middle of nowhere. The sky burns with violent red and oranges that remind me of fire and supernovas. Oddly, it makes me feel a bit Homesick. Irk can't be seen from here, but I can pin point the area where it is.

The millions of lights here make the stars almost invisible. This feels like a crime. Irk is nearly all black at night. The planet is far away from any 'sun' and so we make our own light during the 'day'. At night everyone retreats to the underground. But, if you stay above to witness all the bright, blinding lights being shut down you begin to slowly see the infinite amount of beauty in the Galaxies beyond their planet.

It was because of this that made me want to be an Invader. That and because explosions are fun. Zim was designed for destruction. And this planet, with all its horrible smog and star blocking lights and fiendish water and annoying human boys will fall by my fist. It's only a matter of time.

Then the entire Irken Race will know my name and I will be put in the Irk's History books. All the little smeets will be quizzed on my name. They will wish to be like me. Like the ALMIGHTY ZIM! I raise my hands up in the air, in a victorious screech. This disturbs many little, ugly creatures. Like birds and squirrels and such.

Putrid creatures.

_LOCATION: CITY...SOMEWHERE  
>ENVIORNMENT: DANGER!<br>TIME: 8835 Ligas ( 6:39 pm)_

The DIB! He's so close. So very close. Following me and my breath comes out in huffs. What it makes it worse is that it's snowing. SNOWING THE WRETCHED SNOW OF FROZEN WATER. How dare it? Especially now. Inferior Earth weather. It disgusts me. Why couldn't it be like Irk and just be cl—OH IRK WHERE IS THAT HUMAN? THAT WAS THE NOISE OF THE DIB I KNOW IT!

When had he become so sneaky? So able to slip past my amazing barriers? Panting causes little smoke clouds to fly around me. I slip around a corner. There's ice and I fight the urge to scream.

The STOOPID human boy has an advantage over me this pathetic earth night. He has traction snow boots and a fuzzy scarf. Curse him. I silently vow to obtain both objects.

From the Dib. Yes. I shall steal them and make them my own and force the human to watch while I prance about in them, being all care free and glorICE! HORRID ICE! I HATE THIS PLANET!

The ground is painful. And dirty. I automatically assume it's loaded with germs. I roll the way they taught me at the academy. I'm on my feet again, thankfully. But, there is the Dib. RIGHT THERE. He's smirking in a smirkly smug way. I want to smack him.

So, I do. That wipes the smugness from his face. Ha. HA. HAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Together we go sailing backwards into a big pile of the snow. It sneaks it's way inside my comfy coat and begin to attack my skin with cold. I screech some more, because this is ridiculous. Dib's laughing at me. Horrible monkey boy.

I shake my fist at him and he balls up a big bunch of the snow and throws it in my face. It burns. I vow to kill him. First, however I use TWO HANDS and pick up as much snow as possible before shoving it directly into the human's red face.

We struggle for several minutes in which we end up in the middle of the street, wrestling. Dib ends up on top and I snarl continuously for several minutes, refusing to admit defeat. Zim never loses. NEVER!

Still though, it IS painful here, cold and my pak is shoved against the pavement. It keeps making horrible scratching noises.

"Come on, Zim! Admit it! I won!"

Never, Earth-Stink. You may have won this small battle, but the Earth will be mine. Mine. Including you and the snow. I will destroy it ALL.

"VICTORY FOR EARTH!"

The human is finally off of me, arms raised in his victory. He's grinning obnoxiously, burnt orange eyes glimmering in the dying sunlight. His face is flushed and snow hangs from the strands of unprotected black hair and his pathetic clothes. His silhouette stands before me and he appears so much unlike the pitiable human he is. He's brave and horrible and ruthless.

For some reason I feel frozen. Why can't I move? My chest feels tight. Panic begins to swell up in me. What has the boy done to me?

My Pak whirls a few times;

_WARNING; PAK LOGIC OVERLOAD. SHUTTING DOWN. _

The words echo in my antenna. In my mind. And I can't move any more as Dib laughs and skips off to watch that stupid mystery nonsense show. His amusement is still somehow is louder than everything.

A.N.:

THIS STORY IS SO COMPLICATED. so forgive me if it takes some time to get stuff up. I had to write a whole time line to keep to straight for myself. Then I lost the fuqing timeline... -.- So naow I'm flying by the seat of my pants. YAY

Basiclly his Pak Logic shut off. That essentially makes it so he has less emotions and makes him more irken. However, his constant weird thoughts about Dib overloaded it. That's why in the chapters before it was like, 'Pak Logic does not comprehend...' and he kept ignoreing it and shutting it off.


	6. Chapter 6

Numbness.

I want it. Want to feel the cold sting of detachment. The void, barren landscape of my own mind. Thinking nothing but my mission; destroy, control, conquer….for the Empire.  
>Ever since my PAK had freaked out…Emotions. Feelings….poured through me. Not just anger, not just pride.<p>

But Joy, utter relish when I ate something sweet and caffeinated, Gratitude when Gir actually obeyed for once. But, on top of all those things…was the permanent impression of twin gold orbs. Violent, mocking irises. The ones that belonged to my enemy. They laughed at me, at this new hidden weakness that still made no sense.

Now that I could feel I could hate with all my being, could feel each jolt of loathing as it ran its course through to my core. It was supposed to stay there, a little ball of insistent determination and a goal.

Instead, it fizzled out as soon as it had sprung from remembering that boy's laughter. How I'd been beaten so many times. Left out in the rain. Or captured. The first moment when I'd sensed that this human would be so much more than just a nuisance.  
>A worthy nemesis. An equal.<p>

My eyes feel too heavy to keep open anymore. I am tired and that is unacceptable.

Dib.

Excitement. For the first time in weeks. No…nearly two years. They are calling. Contact.

My people.

My Tallest.

My spooch is beating painfully. Blood rushes and the message on the screen blinks temptingly. With a shaky claw I press the accept button.

Within moments I know it isn't a live chat, but a recorded message that was taken several days ago.

_Transmission Date: December 23, 2015 8:09 PM  
>From: The Massive<br>Subject: Do not respond, Zim._

_Tallest Red- Greetings Zim._

_Tallest Purple- Yes, greetings._

_T.R.- There is, as you can tell, a certain reason we have sent a transmission. This is not usually our style, but due to recent events regarding you and Irk we have decided to finally take—_

_T.P- Action. [Pulls out a list.] Here we have the full extent of you're destructive records. Afterwards we will tell you what we wish for you to do. Now… [Clears throat] Painful Overload Day 1._

_T.R- As well as two._

_Purple- Yes. The accidental assassination of Tallest Myuki by the hands of your uh…_

_Red- Blob thingy. Then soon after the equally accidental assassination of Tallest Spork._

_Purple- [Nods] Blowing up the science wing 238 times._

_Red- Blowing up the docking area 135 times._

_Purple- Blowing up the engine room 12 times._

_Red- Leaking acid all across the control room 4 times. _

Why are they naming all of my greatest accomplishments?

_Purple- Single handedly killing all your troops in Invader Training._

_Red- Then after being given a chance, leaving your post and ruining Operation Impending Doom one._

_Purple- Directly nearly destroying our civilization and causing Irk to go under repairs for the next 100 years as the Control Brain struggled to create new smeets._

_Red- Leaving your trial to get a snack, blowing up the snack machine and destroying power for the entire half of Planet Devastis._

_Purple- Forcing us to take your trial elsewhere. To Irk again, where the Control Brain re-encoded you as a Food Service drone. You were sent to FoodCourtia, banished from Irken life. It was—_

_Red- A generous punishment after what you had done. But, you 0only stayed for 1/16th of your sentence._

_Purple- You came to Conventia using a stolen Voot Cruiser and begged for a part in O.I.D 2. How could we turn you down when we were afraid that you would kill us too? That's when—_

_Red- I came up with the plan to send you to a planet that was unmarked and far, far away from our area of conquering._

_Purple- You took it without questioning, asking us where it was. We found a random planet at the very far end of the universe that had never really been examined before because of the toxic fluid found there._

_Red- We congratulated ourselves on a job well done when you left, basically a million, million light-years away from us and any damage you could do. We took it as our cue to relax, assuming somewhere along the way you would be terminated by your own stupidity._

What? T-terminated…

_Purple- [sighs] only we forgot to factor in the crazy luck you have, and your own instincts for self preservation._

_Red- You called us seven months later, telling us you were settled in and ready to destroy these 'humans' and Earth would be part of the Conquered plants soon. We were in shock to say the least and very skeptical._

_Purple- But, you weren't near us so we let you have your way. Until…the calls started. You called every day almost. Boring us to tears with your encounters with Dib and Dogs and Meat and uh…other gross sounding things._

_Red- We considered that your version of progress. Maybe you could actually do this. Maybe. Then you took the Massive for a joy ride and as predicted messed things up for yourself._

_Purple- On the 5th year of you being on that Planet we realized that you were hopeless. The other invaders had already claimed their planets and had come back for more. We were in Operation Impending Doom 3._

Has it already been five years?

_Red- You were still blabbering on about your plans for taking over. However we knew there were obstacles that kept getting in your way. Why else would one Invader who had been on trial twice, and escaped twice and managed to destroy so many lives…how could you not have succeeded yet?_

_Purple- It made no sense to us. So we looked things up. Hacked your programs and found out that your Defection was becoming much worse._

_Red- [nod] You'd claimed a human, as your Jemna and possibly had plans to return with him to Irk. We couldn't let that happen. It was one thing to be Defective…another to bring an alien lover as your Jemna. It's unheard of and Jemnas are illegal Zim. You knew this. Thought you could get around it somehow. _

M-My what? Jemna? Like a Kribliss? On the level of a Verd'ika…  
>Insanity…Dib as m-my…<p>

_Purple- No one does, Zim. Not even the most powerful people in the Universe. [Red and Purple exchange a look] can get past the Control Brain's laws._

_Red- So, that was the final incident that convinced us that you were unsalvageable and no longer an asset to the Empire._

_Purple- This is your final warning and direct orders._

_Red- Stay on earth, Zim._

_Purple- With your Jemna._

_Red- You will not return to Irk or to the Massive unless you wish to be destroyed._

_Purple- We will not tolerate you anymore, Zim._

_Red- If we hear or see any activity that indicates your even thinking about leaving the atmosphere of your planet…_

_Purple-…we will take violent action._

_Red- Good bye Zim._

_Purple- Good bye. Terminate the transmission._

_Transmission: Terminated._

_Sent to: Zim. _

**Good-bye, My Tallest...**

I can't feel anything. It's like I'm being frozen. Lost in the center of some great, barren planet. And then suddenly I am on fire. Being thrown into a vat of water.

The floor is hard and my knees will be dirty later because the computer hasn't swept yet…There's a ringing. It won't go away. No air in my spooch.

Someone is screaming. They are loud and annoying but, when I yell to tell them to stop, I cut myself off.

It's me. That pitiful thing is me.

Worthless.

_Author's Note:_

_Verd'ika is Desdemona-Kakalose's_

_Kribliss if SWING-21's_

_( Both are gorgeous and awesome writers. Look 'em up. Or I'll link them to you if you're lazy. )_

_Jemna is mine._

_I don't own IZ. _

_Also, this one is a fail. I'm just sleepy and ill and wanting to finish stuff._


End file.
